D o c . C o D kata ..

is pasrah .. 

sometymes in life ,there are things we really want, but we dun get. In some cases we might get upset over it becoz we feel we deserved it etc but the fact that we dun't get it could be for our highest gud.

sepi ku sepimu :)

Malam ini sepi kembali melanda dan menyerangku
Mengusik dan mengganggu ketenangan hati dan bathin
Terus mengusik dan mengusik ketenangan
Mengingat kembali pada semua kenangan
Dan mendatangkan rasa kesepian

Dan aku …….
Termakan oleh sepi yang kau hadirkan
Tenggelam dalam keegoisan
Terdiam dalam kegelapan
Dan kesepian ……

Aku di sini semakin terpuruk dan terpuruk
Dalam kesepian ini
Dalam kesendirian ini
Dalam keadaan yang sepi ini
Dalam sepiku dan sepimu.

 

m a n u s i a b o d o h . . (adaband)

Dahulu terasa indah
Tak ingin lupakan
Bermesraan selalu jadi Satu kenangan manis 

Tiada yang salah
Hanya aku manusia bodoh
Yang biarkan semua ini permainkanku
Berulang ulang kali

Mencoba bertahan sekuat hati
Layaknya karang yang dihempas sang ombak
Jalani hidup dalam buai belaka
Serahkan cinta tulus di dalam takdir 

Tapi sampai kapankah kuharus
Menanggungnya kutukan cinta ini
Bersemayam dalam kalbu

Tak ayal tingkah lakumu
Buatku putus asa
Kadang akal sehat ini
Belum cukup membendungnya 

Hanya kepedihan
Yang selalu datang menertawakanku
Engkau belahan jiwa
Tega menari indah di atas tangisanku 

Semua kisah pasti ada akhir
Yang harus dilalui
Begitu juga akhir kisah ini
Yakinku indah

 

For the happiness you have brought into my life. is worth more than anything else in my life ... 

*

*

*

 

                i close my eyes,and try to hide,hide from these feelings,that I have inside.dunnoe noe how to explain,what it is that i feel.all i know is,it is for real.. (still nak ego en) ..

*

*

*

the Question is, how high my ego. serious.

down !!!

downn!!

and dowwn!!!!

ahh..

i'm weak.. :(

hmm..

"patience is virtue" 

 

 

 

* Until end, i will keep this words ..

.till then.

d a d . .

I am that kind of girl that loves you but hates you. my heart wants to hate you ... i hate who i am and who i thought i  would never be .. tengss dad, tengss for everything. tengss .. i will go from you. tengss ! no worries.. i know, i'm not ur daughter anymore. tengs dad. . i will go. . truly, i hate u but inside my heart. i love you so much . 

is will be alone after this.

oh yes. once again..

d e a r l o r d . .

I know I’m waiting..waiting for something..
Something to happen to me,but this waiting comes with
Trials and challenges..nothing in life is free
I wish that somehow..you’d tell me out aloud
that on that day I’ll be ok..but we’ll never know cause
that’s not the way it works..help me find my way

My Lord show me right from wrong..give me light make me strong
I know the road is long..make me strong..Sometimes it just gets too much..i feel that I’ve lost touch..i know the road is long..make me strong..i know I’m waiting..yearning for something
Something known only to me..this waiting comes with
trials and challenges..life is one mystery and i wish that somehow..you’d tell me out aloud
that on that day you’ll forgive me..but we’ll never know cause
that’s not the way it works..i beg for your mercy..my Lord show me right from wrong
Give me light make me strong..i know the road is long
make me strong..sometimes it just gets too much.. i feel that I’ve lost touch
  i know the road is long...make me strong

m a l i l s i s t a . .

Eira, she's my lil sista AND also my best pwends . she's adorable ryte T_T

Dear, u are the best little sister ever i had..you are the best sister that i could ever wish for  ..

Tengss eira, along will try be good for you dear..and promise me, study hard k :)

get flying colour for ur UPSR!

 chaiyok-chaiyok.. as i promise, if u get 5A in ur UPSR, along buy new hp for u (",)

love u Eyra :)

 

s m i l e :)

* today,no matter what happens i'm going to smiles a lot...b'coz it’s easier than explaining why I looked so sad.T_T

.till then.

sial ke saya ?

SIAL a.k.a SYIAL

 * Sumpah ! ida terasa dengan ayat atau bunyi nie? ida ni si sangat ke sampai kau nak perkata-kan sebegitu kt eyda? ida terasa sangat-sangat.  EVEN niat kau gurau,tapi serious ida terasa sangat-sangat.Tak tahu kenapa. Tiba-tiba mood ida berubah jadi mendung, air mata mengalir dan bertanya "sial, apakah itu aq" .

-

Serious sgt sgt..  terasa. Maybe sial ida dah timpa pada diri kau, aq minta maaf atas semua nie. Kerana sial ida ni juga lah, ida dah banyak nyusahkan hidup orangg(termaksud kau). ida mintaa maaff.. ida tak tahu kenapa ida nak menangis and rasa terluka dengan kata-kata itu . . Maybe, 1 hari nanti, akan sembuhnya sial ida bila idaa tak ada.., i think so ! i wish that. 

ahhh.. kenapa eyda tibe-tibe emoo..

kepada dia yang cakap "sial" pada ida.. ida mix maaf sgt sgt, eyda xthu nape ida emo gile2. nk period kot,bunth rr....eyda ngisss :( , seriousss!! 

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andai baca entry nie, xperlulah mix maaf pada eyda. kerana ida dah lama maafkan ye. even sakit mane pun,ida still boleh menerima semua nie,dengan tabah dan ikhlas.

sorry.  macam ne saya nak senyum balik ye.

hey,pujuk cepat  :(

 ✔  I may not be pretty,I'm not perfect. I'm not proper. I'm Just Me .

Hey . .  Im grateful with god's creation.☺

Pretend to be ok and  keep a smile on my face but Inside Im dying . . 

If you'd look at me, you'd see..the girl i am..isn't me. ✌

I’m going to smile and make you think I’m happy, I’m going to laugh, so you don’t see me cry. .

 

YES, i'm going to smilee . .

p e r f e c t i o n . . i w i s h t h a t . .

Sometimes you'd wished that you're always a perfectionist,

However, as they have always said, when we fall, we'll learn from it.
But what if when you fall, you wont ever get up again, those fears and scars still haunting you. Hmm.. Ok oks, maybe im just a lil bit too much exaggerating.
But come on, you dont wanna bad things to happen to your life right? Oh wells.

-

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Lets just pray for a smooth journey, ok babe? (: 

-

-
I dont really know what to say about sa-rang.
Too good to be true. Leaves me bewildered and waiting.
Ive always wonder when this sa-rang will stop and fade away. Hahs, cause it have always been in my mind.
Sometimes, you show no effort at all. & the conversation i'd wished it'd be more spontaneous, not just the sweet whispering or nothings. Helloo are we there yet?

Kerana tanpamu, aku sepi.

eyda..  

d e a r m a h e a r t . .

You’re weird. First you gave love a chance, loving the wrong person for so long. You gave it all you had and let yourself open without thinking that you’ll ever get hurt and for two long years, you loved with all you had even though you knew that the other heart did not love you as much. You kept loving and loving, hoping that you & the other heart will meet half way. Then the time actually came … the time where you got hurt. Not just a short amount of hurt; you were hurt for half a year. For half a year … you were completely broken & shattered. So broken that everybody noticed it. You didn’t want to give love a chance again; never again. Why would you give love another chance when you have gone through so much bullshit and lies? One of my old friends once said to me “He ripped out your heart; stepped all over it, crushing it to pieces and then just left it there without even cleaning it up” and honestly; I’m very sorry. So so so so so sorry that I put you through so much hurt & pain. 

That is why I kept you locked up. I was never going to put you through more pain. So when this new guy came in my life, I kept you locked up even though you kept telling me to go for it while my head kept telling me “no” because I wanted to keep you protected. But you kept trying to come out and over power my mind. So after all the things you’ve been through you still wanted to open up to this new guy, which amazed me. He must be something special if you wanted to give love another try just for this one new guy. Then finally, you over-powered my mind. I listened to you rather then my head. I’m glad I did listen to you heart because I can honestly say that I am truly happy and I feel as if you are healed. You are so much better. You helped me turn from that bitter heart broken to this happy smiling girl. After that six months, you decided that you’ll give love another chance. Thank you because I have a good feeling about this guy. A very good feeling. Thank you for telling me to go for him. I’m so happy because even though I put you through so much pain, hurt, tears, bullshit, lies, and torture, you are still willing to give love another chance.

 Truly from my heart.

.eyda kecik.

- till then- 

n o t i t l e . .

 

Ku harus menemui cintaku,Mencari tahu hubungan kita,Apa masih atau tlah berakhir , Kau menggantungkan hubungan ini,Kau diamkan aku tanpa sebab,Maunya apa ku harus bagaimana
Kasih…Sampai kapan kau gantung,Cerita cintaku memberi harapan,Hingga mungkin ku tak sanggup lagi.Dan meninggalkan dirimu,Detik-detik waktu pun terbuang,Teganya kau menggantung cintaku,Bicaralah biar semua pasti,Tentunya hubungan cinta denganmu,Membuat ku sakit,Hingga mungkin ku tak sanggup lagi. Dan meninggalkan dirimu

Tak pernah ku bayangkan semua ini terjadi,Ketika cinta ini di tentang mereka
Hancurnya hati ini mengingat semua,Cinta yang selama ini aku banggakan,Aku harus bersabar,Ketika mereka tak mengerti,Dengan cinta ini,Ternyata kisah cinta tak selalu indah,Kini harus ku alami kepedihan ini,Aku harus bersabar,Ketika mereka tak mengerti,Dengan cinta ini,Maafkanlah diriku,Mungkin kita harus mengakhiri,Kisah cinta ini.

 P/s: Pretending to smile even though it hurts inside.